Back on track..slowly!

Well, I am back on track.  Been trying to get out running, it's not as easy, definitely hurts.  My ankle starts hurting right away, and I tend to overcompensate on my left leg, but then it gets sore. At least I'm starting again! My sister ran her first full marathon on Saturday! Very proud of her, and she inspires me!  I'm heading back down again, that makes me super happy!  I would LOVE to see the 220's next week, but we'll have to wait and see what happens.  Still watching what i eat, but I don't say absolutely NO to something,,,just have a small piece, and I found those Fibre 1 brownies...they are so good. I'm a sugar junky!  Feeling good and happy to be starting back, and I have to say, feeling very relieved that I am able to run! On the roads too..I have to watch where I go, some sidewalks are really rough and I just speed walk those.  I don't take any chances! I am so much slower though...went from running a 5 km in 48.24 mins to 4.61 km in 57.19 mins! That's a big difference! 


weight:233.0
Waist : 42
Hips :53
Bust : 52

Yay! Down 2.4 lbs!!! That feels so good to be going down again!!  Ok...on to another great week and getting out there! Onwards and downwards on my journey!! Wanna be sporting a new bathing suit come summer! ;)

Slow Start!

So I only got out once last week.  Mother Nature has not been cooperating! We had another 6 inches drop and then a big cold snap so the roads are really icy and uneven.  Had to talk the hubby into a track pass, and he finally relented so this week I will start at the track! I am feeling really down about it.  I feel like I have put myself so far behind.  I know I can always continue on, but it's just frustrating as I know how far I would be if I'd never hurt myself. 

weight:235.4
Waist : 42
Hips :53
Bust : 52

On a plus..found these super yummy chocolate snacks! They are sweet and tasty!  Only thing is I have an aversion to bananas.  I love them, but they don't love me.  Usually end up with a tummy ache and diarrhoea.  I was hoping that dried bananas might be different.  I have a reaction but it is way milder then fresh bananas.  Just a bit of a tummy ache, so that's OK! I can handle that. 

So tomorrow I am heading up to the Canada Games Tournament Capital Centre and going to get a month pass to the track.  Then I am going to make sure I get back into it.  No more being super careful.  I don't know if it's just fear or caution, but I am so scared I am going to hurt myself again and it really hurt! I remember every detail...the sound, the pain.  And I get a sick feeling in my stomach. I have a feeling my fear is making my recovery longer as I am procrastinating and making excuses.  I have to face that fear...head on!  Easy to say...harder to do! But onwards and downwards we go!!

Why? I hate snow!!

weight:235.4
Waist : 42
Hips :53
Bust : 52

I was all set...all mentally geared up to go for a walk maybe run!  Was going to do it and start again!  But what does mother nature do?  She decided to drop 6 inches of snow that morning.  This is EXACTLY the weather that was happening when I hurt my ankle, and if you think I am going to make that mistake again, you are wrong!  No way to see 2 feet in front of you thanks to snow falling, and the roads, sidewalks, etc are covered in snow so a hazard!  I just can't risk sending myself back to square one!  At this point I can walk, but if I get on unstable terrain, just a little pitch right or left and I get shooting pains through the ankle.  What if I were to fall again?  Not worth the possibility of an accident. So instead, I shovelled the driveway and did some housework.  I kept busy, but not doing what I really wanted to!  I'm OK with it...tomorrow is another day!  I may have to get a month pass to the track so I can do it indoors.  At least it's a safe environment! Just got to get the hubby on board with paying for the pass!  OK...that'll be my goal.  Get a month pass, and hopefully by February the weather is better and I can start out on the roads again!  I won't do the gym, I hate treadmills.  They don't feel the same, and I get dizzy on them.  So that's a no go! OK..I have a plan! Ha ha snow! Take that! So hopefully next weigh in is an actual LOSS! I mean..it's good I am staying the same! At least I'm not gaining! Gonna watch the Biggest Loser and get motivated with them! :) Onwards and downwards!! :D See you next week!

No Change...yet!

Let's be completely honest with one another.  It's so hard to go from watching what you eat and exercising and being so on track, to zip...nada..zilch and then back again!  Old habits..especially habits that were created and honed in 35 years..die hard!  They can get brought out of retirement too easily, and are smarter and harder to lock back up again!  I am trying, I am struggling...I am finding this even harder then just beginning!  Probably because I know what I went from, and where I am at now, all over a 1 minute mistake!

weight:235.4
Waist : 42
Hips :53
Bust : 52

No change..nothing, but...I haven't been able to run yet.  My ankle is still swollen and very sore, and I am terrified of getting out there.  Not that I am afraid of falling, more like I am afraid of not being able to run again, or for a long time.   But I am getting out there again on Monday.  The kids are back in school, the routine begins again, and I will go for a walk.  That is all I am promising myself.  A nice long 5 km walk.  I won't run unless I really feel I can.  If I feel I can, I will start very slow, very gently and for a minute..tops!  This is my promise to myself.  Now, about my eating...oh my.  I am really trying, but after months of deprivation, and missing being a glutton, it is so hard to say no again!  I will continue to fight that little demon!  I look at it like this, I have set myself back a month or two to my personal deadline, but I still can do this!  I really, really want this Breast reduction.  I really want to get down to 180lbs!  I want to have these changes and I am still very determined! So onwards and downwards on my incredible journey.  Hurt ankle and all, I will continue! I refuse to let a small bump in the road, deter me from my goal!